30 October 2017
Today I was in the payment queue of a superstore and next was my turn. All on a sudden, a lady aging 50+ appeared and requested, “I have just one item and I am in a hurry. Would you please allow me to pay first?” Before she is done with her sentences, I nodded my head with a mild smile. Thanking me, she approached to the counter. While she was leaving the counter paying the bill, I have called her from the back. Once she looked back, I said, ” Thank you”. She stood still for a while, surprised, smiled and went away…Sometimes it’s not about only helping others rather favoring ourselves to get the feeling of goodness that triggered, “Thank you”.
21 September 2017
This is one of the biggest transformation I have made recently. Whenever I think of someone who gave me bitter experience (e.g. harming, jealousy, backbiting, hatred, defaming), I find just one good in them (which everyone has, or may be the art of harming/deception, which would have brought so much of goodness, had this been applied with positive intention in somewhere else). If I can’t do that, I replace the bad feeling (I had with them/their actions) with the affection, love, caring, compassion, appreciation, sacrifice made for me by so many wonderful and beautiful people around me- this makes me feel awesomely better and immensely blessed (you may try this and teach your kids too) I have the choice of not loving someone and hating him or her deep. But, I also can choose not to love and not to hate as well. If you can’t love someone, not necessarily you have to hate him or her. Once we generate the flame of hatred in our thought, we hurt ourselves as in that state, our mind can’t remain at peace. So, if you truly love yourself, you can’t hate others and that’s the oneness the world needs the most.
27 August 2017
This evening, I have been on the way back home after office and I was stuck in terrific traffic at Mirpur. Nearby was a market and I, taking the benefit out of the traffic and got down from the car to buy some vegetables. While coming back to my car, I saw, the minibus in front is from a Force (intentionally not mentioning the specific force name). The driver was not in uniform, but was smoking (his right hand was out of window, holding a cigarette). I was in a dilemma for a second or two, but then I walked towards him straightway, paying a salaam, I have asked him whether he serves that Force. He said, “Yes”. Then I asked back, “If you don’t take it otherwise, can I tell something”? He nodded his head (while doing so, he has put the hand inside the window). I added, “Bhai, once you serve in the Forces, doesn’t matter whether you are in uniform or civil dress, you always represent your Force. Smoking while driving a Govt. vehicle and that to, being a member of a Force, this is not a good example, you are setting for others, not something that neither your force nor you can be really proud of”. He acknowledged, dropped the cigarette and said to me thanks with a smile (kind of guilty smile as I noticed). If we want to make something right or correct someone, we need to focus on the purpose/intention (and in most cases not insulting the one or not trying to be hero in public) and better way/approach that might work, humiliation mostly doesn’t bring correction or positive change, right understanding does.
10 August 2017
Motivational speeches make us feel good, but it does not change our life until we act- which is entirely in our hands, not on who motivates us. I strongly believe, in a country of 170 million, with so many social problems and mental blocks, we need lot more motivational speakers. If we have 1000 now, we need a million. But, the speakers should believe and act on what they say. What people tell about the motivators, that is not important, what matters is- what the motivators tell themselves once they are alone. If someone can talk well, that doesn’t make him/her a motivational speaker as anyone can read books, watch different talks and can eventually deliver a wonderful speech. Then, what really makes one a motivator? Yes, a rickshaw puller can be a great motivational speaker- he can share how he lives a happy life that a millionaire can only dream of. From a Stammer (Many times I even got it extremely difficult to just utter my name), I have turned into a Speaker, so, I can also motivate. Anyone has overcome something, achieved something or transformed himself/herself or a student arranging his/her tuition fees without burdening parents or even someone living a simple and meaningful life, can be an ambassador of motivation- which the country needs most. Almost entire society are after fame, power, status, money and so on, leaving the purpose. Who will guide these masses? The motivators must have a purpose, which is beyond materialistic gain. And those who criticize, they also need to have a bigger purpose, do I want to correct someone/help someone or I want to some light on me? And as a Speaker, what I am telling now, I am less likely to tell the same thing after a year later. If not, how will I learn? So, if you are highlighting what one said in the past, which only indicates you are not learning anything new and you won’t want anyone out there to learn and share. And regarding Sharing, our mothers even unintentionally/intentionally change the statement that our aunts made. So, please don’t just share what one says/posts. Share immediately if it’s a positive news, think 100 times if it’s something negative about someone. Remember, someday, that someone can be even you. We don’t really think deep. Let’s think and grow rich.
8 August 2017
Getting a good grade, getting a promotion, off to a long cherished foreign tour, buying a new car, being a father/mother makes us extremely happy. See, all these desires are related to future and we keep on pursuing those. But, happiness can’t be pursued, it lies right at this moment, “NOW”. Here comes the big question, “Then, how we can be happy right now”. I have just thought, probability of anyone of us being alive tomorrow is less than the probability of buying a new car next month or a promotion after 3 months or a euro tour after 6 months or booking a flat in 2018 or experiencing the fatherhood/motherhood in 2019. So, why can’t we practice being grateful, feeling happy right now, right at any given moment just because we are alive”. We all have, what we need to be happy right now, it’s just the perspective.
28 July 2017
My wife has cooked Khichuri and Chicken for tonight. In the evening, we have asked the security guards (of the building) not to cook anything for them as we would be sending dinner. We do this very often, may be in the form of dinner or some snacks or even I drop something down from my shopping bag for them while returning home. This evening, I have gone down to buy Fanta for tonight, my wife loves drinking that. I have bought two 600 ml Fanta and one 600 ml Coke. In the gate, I asked one guard (the senior most, aged around 60), “Does he take Coke”? He replied, ” No”. I questioned back, “What about Fanta”? This time, he smiled and nodded his head. And it’s kind of a smile/expression, you feel some vibration inside. The maids we have, they take almost the same menu as us. If we call an electrician or anyone coming from Pureit, he is offered a glass of ‘Shorbot’ at least. If I talk about my driver, if I buy 3 ‘puri’, I offer him one. Rickshaw puller, who takes me from Bazar to house, sometimes, I offer him a mango/apple/Juice from the bags. If I buy a juice for me in ferry, I buy another for the bus driver. I feel extremely rich inside to buy the Rickshaw puller a cold Frutika (along with his fare) after the ride under the scorching sun. Not always, but, I try to offer something to the shopkeepers if I am eating some on move in Bazar/shopping. Day before yesterday, I went to Star Kabab with one of my friends. Once the boy brought tea for us, we offered him to have a cup of tea with us. Though he didn’t take in the end, but there was a signature smile on his face. And not necessarily every time there will be that smile, but there will certainly be the vibrations. I do these kinds of small stuffs not to feel supervisor or make them feel inferior (the way I say, it’s the same tone/gesture that I use for my guests at home) rather I want to make them feel one thing…. “He/She is also in a kind of profession I am in. His/her job is as important to the society as my job to my company and he/she is doing great”. This message is very important to spread peace, compassion and positivity in the society and for our future generations. Once I do these small stuffs, trust me, I feel something inside and they do also feel they are part of the society and they have some obligations/responsibilities as well. This oneness is the key and we all should try to spread more love, affection, kindness, empathy, positivity, care and humanity- this silly gesture will make big differences someday in the society
21 July 2017
July is the month, I was born, to be more precise, 21st it is. Today I would like to share a simple idea with you all NOT to be unhappy and depressed. There are 4 weeks in every month in an average. In 1st week, meet a person, who doesn’t have hands. Meet another person, who doesn’t have legs in the 2nd week. Keep the 3rd week for the one who can’t speak and meet a blind person on 4th. Pass only 30 minutes with each of them, be a passionate listener with some questions. The blind one would probably say he would have been the happiest if he could have been able to see just the nature. If we practice this weekly routine for couple of months, being grateful will become a habit and the biggest problem of most of our lives will be solved. The person who has won a lottery and the other one who have lost his legs, after one year, both of their happiness comes back to almost same level as it was before, and study has proven that as well. If we can’t be happy where we are now, we will never be happy even after reaching where we want to be in future.
20 July 2017
I was out for a late dinner at Star Kabab few days back with one of my friends. While parking our car, we saw a microbus driver started using slang with another car owner (who was driving by himself and could have waited a little bit, letting the microbus to be parked). After the car left, I went closer to the microbus driver and greeted him with Salaam. Then I asked him whether we could talk for a minute. Taking him aside, keeping hands on his shoulder with affection, I told him, “Brother, is it a good thing to use slang in the streets? You might have a school going kid, he/she will be ashamed he/she comes to know his/her father using such slangs publicly. Moreover, once you were telling something bad about someone’s mother, the other one would also use slang directing to your parents. Why to insult our parents who might have already been in the graveyard? And using slang does not bring any solution rather it might make the situation worse…………….. “. He then felt very ashamed, (the same guy who was very furious with dirty words just before 2-3 minutes), said sorry and promised not to repeat the same in future. The lesson I took from that- “Irrespective of that man might use slang again some other day, but he felt guilty and sorry without any external pressure, accepting his mistake. The point I am trying to make- we often complain that people don’t change even though we try a lot. But, I feel, problem lies within us. Because in most scenarios, we choose to be a hero rather than correcting someone. Every day, number of incidents take place at Universities, Offices, Public Places and so on, where we can at least try to correct someone and most situation doesn’t demand humiliation/beating for correction. So, whether we really want to correct someone or prefer to be a hero- that’s the call we must make. We need some unsung heroes, who can leave the craving of stardom and work for the result.
16 June 2017
Today I was going to attend an Iftar party at around 6 PM. Once I was around 1 kilometer away from my destination, I noticed one aged couple, standing on the edge of the road was trying to signal my CNG as they didn’t see me inside. Both had some bags, fruit packets in hand. Immediately, I have felt an inner calling and an obligation as well. I asked the CNG driver to stop. Getting down, I took couple of steps and told them “Uncle, you can take this CNG and for me, it will take a 10-minute walk”. I paid my fare & the CNG driver too agreed to take them to their destination. Before getting into the CNG, that uncle (will be a bit older than my father) extended his hand for a sake and the aunty gave a kind, motherly expression with full of love and blessings. And while walking, in every step, the joy and bliss I felt inside, I would have walked 10-15 miles for that feeling. Often, I do these kinds of stuffs and release the child inside. We all need positive energy to live happily and this is well within our reach, if we choose to and it’s like the chain reaction, like the ripple in the water. If 1{ea984b42cd495838c1c56c02550b97ca9c73d6e4d89fcad92f9dac8cf03a9632} of world’s population start releasing positive energy, around 30{ea984b42cd495838c1c56c02550b97ca9c73d6e4d89fcad92f9dac8cf03a9632} people will be positively affected. We have both negative & positive energies for our own & others wellbeing. Which one we will release, that’s our call and good part is that this call, we can make in every moment we live.
28 May 2017
There is a big difference between sharing one’s opinion and instigating others or hurting others sentiment. One thing I try to teach in my school/college sessions- “Respecting others opinion and expressing your views without hurting others sentiment”. This is a very easy job that every single citizen can do. I feel very ashamed seeing lot many senior citizens/intellectuals don’t focus on solving an issue rather they keep on adding fuel. If you really love your country, just do few things, 1. Respect others opinion, 2. Express your views without hurting others sentiment, 3. Don’t share any news that you are not 100{ea984b42cd495838c1c56c02550b97ca9c73d6e4d89fcad92f9dac8cf03a9632} sure. 4. Respect every profession, problem lies with some individuals, but don’t use slangs to the profession itself e.g. Doctor, Teacher, Police, Army, Engineer, Artist…. there are many people from every profession, who make lot of sacrifice for our better living, let’s not hurt them, 5. Before you take an action/beat someone/take lead in any procession/harass someone, please ask yourself, “What’s my purpose of doing this? Do I want to be a hero? Will I get pleasure insulting him/her? Do I want to be in the limelight? Am I doing this just because someone instigated me? Or I really want to bring some positive change? Only an honest answer of this can solve 90{ea984b42cd495838c1c56c02550b97ca9c73d6e4d89fcad92f9dac8cf03a9632} of our problems/issues.
8 May 2017
Would like to talk about the CNG driver, who has dropped me house (from office) this evening. He owns a land worth of 10 Million BDT, which he bought 7 years back by his own earning. His current monthly income is 35K, adding his son’s remittance from Saudi Arabia, which stands around 65K and he saves more than half of this. He might be richer than many of us in terms of wealth. Then, is he more successful than us? The answer is NO. Success means GROWTH, may be in terms of knowledge, fitness, relation, mindset, habit, behavior, wealth and what not. We, ourselves define our success and its area of concentration, not others. And one’s success can’t be compared to another, in the field of success, my competitor is just me.
5 May 2017
Today, someone’s father has died, someone else’s mother has had a severe heart-attack. Someone’s sister gets diagnosed as cancer, someone else’s brother gets addicted to drug. Someone had to rush from office as the maid fled away stealing valuables, someone else probably is waiting outside the operation theater (wife is inside). Someone’s mobile is being snatched away while returning home, someone else probably had to sell his phone for son’s treatment. Someone’s brotherlike friend has just committed a road accident, someone else might have lost his job today. There are so many things those are out of our control, but somehow most of our days pass without anything like that. Every day is a good day, some days are just better. #Being #Grateful #Is #The #Key
4 May 2017
These are what have made me feel extremely good in this weekend. Too many in a day though; sharing 2 from the 4 small, but impact-making events. Today, I was late in Juma prayer & eventually had to stand outside the mosque under the scorching sun. Fortunately, I carried a Jaynamaaj along with me. The gentleman at my right aging 50+ seemed very uncomfortable & he literally said, “Pa pure jachchhe”. The other old man ageing 60+ replied, “hashorer moydane aaro onek beshi gorom hobe”. I shared my jaynamaaj with the person at my right and then once I look left; seeing the older man, I felt like holding him & changed my place with him as well. It was hot beneath the feet, but till the time, my prayer was over, the heat seemed kind of healer to me.
In the evening, I have been waiting down for a rickshaw. I saw two ladies ageing 45-50 too waiting for a rickshaw with some seemingly heavy bags. They have walked a bit of distance towards the direction from where rickshaws generally come. I seemed smarter than them & I walked a bit far faster once I saw a rickshaw is coming. The rickshaw puller has agreed to take me to my destination. Consciously, I looked back & saw the two ladies are still waiting. I changed my mind & asked the rickshaw puller (showing them) to pick them as they have been waiting before me with heavy bags. The rickshaw puller looked confused, but followed my request. They didn’t know my favor this time unlike prayer time, but I felt much better. One of the best of the feelings is we favor someone even without telling him/her. These kinds of unconditional small good works can make us feel awesomely good. And it’s kind of a chain, where tiny good deeds not only make us feel better, but spread positivity all around as well. #Happiness #is #within #us
